Bounced over last weekend to ride the Line 2+4 LRT expansion. Rode the very nice TransitWay BRT for the first time as well. First pic is Line 1 oops.
My first election as a Canadian citizen! I can finally vote :)
At some point in March 2020, shortly after it was clear that life as we knew it was on pause indefinitely, I wanted to stock up my fridge and bar with the essentials: gin & beer. To limit my exposure, I wanted to get enough so I wouldn’t need to go to the LCBO for at least another month. I grabbed the largest backpack I had and set out on foot.
I came home with at least two bottles of gin and enough beer that I immediately needed to foam roll my back. The beer that was supposed to last me one month made it to the end of the week. The gin that was supposed to get me through the end of times was down to about half a bottle. At this point, it was clear the pandemic would last far longer than two weeks, and this was becoming unsustainable.
Seeing my empty fridge and the bin full of empties, I grabbed every bottle of alcohol on my bar and started dumping them down the drain. Unknowingly, I was about to join the millions of other people my age who were exploring the world of sober curiosity.
I don’t believe I had a problem with drinking and I still don’t believe I do. I was drinking because I was bored. But I did feel like I was getting close to losing control and I was tired of feeling like shit. Thanks to things like Bubly and Aha and even my poor, neglected SodaStream, I was able to get by without any issues right away. That is until I wanted a Negroni. I was absolutely craving that bitter sting of a Negroni. 1 part gin, 1 part vermouth, 1 part Campari, 1 part euphoria.
I tried a lot of non-alcoholic substitutes. Only to realize they’re all pretty bad. It reminds me of when I first went vegan and tried to get meat substitutes; some are okay, but others are truly horrible.
I’m back now to a fully stocked bar, I’m back to going out from time to time. When I do drink, it’s rare for me to have more than a few drinks. Most of my friends aren’t going crazy and a few have stopped drinking completely. I have no desire to be sober, but my urge to be able to have a bitter drink to sip that’s not alcoholic only grows stronger and stronger. If anything, I want to become accidentally sober. I want to drink less in the same way I don’t eat a lot of meat today because there are so many amazing vegetarian and vegan dishes.
So far I’ve found some good things:
Tonic Water
Much of the Gin & Tonic flavour comes from the tonic, ergo…
Barbet
This is a very floral kind of drink that scratches the juniper-sized itch gin would normally provide. It’s a bit of an acquired taste and quite unlike anything else I’ve ever had. It’s a great example of a non-alcoholic drink that’s not trying to replicate anything in the alcoholic world, it’s just its own thing.
Gingerbug
A not-kombucha-but-kind-of-like-kombucha Ginger beer. It’s a little sweet like Barbet with a nice sting from the ginger.
Bad things I’ve tried:
Seedlip
This is typically the first thing recommended to people on a non-alcoholic kick. I’ve tried several different flavours, it’s just really not my jam
Most non-alcoholic beers
I’ve tried so so many. Most can get the flavour down well, but they finish very poorly.
All of these are due for April 30th, 2021. Let’s start the year strong!
3 Month Emergency Fund In Cash
Combined with my RRSPs, I have more than that goal. I want to build back up that savings account back up.
*Read 3 non-fiction books
I want to get better at technical writing. The advice I’ve heard over
and over is you need to read and take note of how people write.
Progress: 0/3
Release 10 YouTube Videos
I’ve been making funny YouTube videos for a bit now and I want to get
better at writing the scripts and using my video editing tools.
Progress: 1/10
Relaunch Mass Transient
I started this podcast several years ago. Really didn’t have the time to
do it right so put it on the shelf. More eager now to tap into my
creative side.
Run 100KM
This is in total, not all at once. Getting fat from the holidays.
Progress: 10KM
Start with Part 1 for the rundown on what’s going on here
I just finished the first book in this challenge. This post is going to start with a sad story: my Kobo ate all of the highlights and notes I made in this book. Lesson learned that I should have started writing this blog post while I was reading.
The Book
The Gist
The author of this book paints a picture of how to live in a diverse society through his actions. This is done tastefully without making himself look pious or holier-than-thou.
Following 9/11, he encouraged his church to reach out to a nearby mosque. They gave support in different ways, one of which was offering to run errands with members of the mosque if they felt unsafe going out alone.
He and his wife befriended their Muslim neighbours in their first apartment complex.
All of this was done out of love. Not out of a desire to convert. He stressed throughout the book that he was 100% Christian. This wasn’t a diet Christianity that he was practicing and insisted that this is how Jesus would have behaved in the same situation.
Finding Meaning
I’m someone who flirts with being some mix of Agnostic, culturally Christian, a Red-Letter Christian or Buddhist (depending on the day). I don’t necessarily find my self holding on to a single holy text. I do, however, find myself clutching on to dogma in other ways.
In my earlier posts, I talk about going zero-waste and living a more intentional/deliberate life. Let me tell you; there’s some cult level dogma out there. You can run down a very toxic rabbit hole that consumes your life and you forget why you’re even doing this.
In the book, McLaren talks about the “Us vs. Them.” We perceive the “enemy” to be the “Them” when, in reality, the “Us” can be more dangerous. We do things to make sure the “Us” knows we’re on the same team. In the context of Christianity, this might look like an anti-Semitic post on Facebook. That post might get you closer with the “Us” but it doesn’t get you closer to Jesus, it’s not showing love.
There’s a part of a chapter where he talks about different ways of there being an “Us vs. Them” conflict within different major religions. Again, my highlights got eaten, so I can’t recall the specific examples, but just off the top of my head I’m thinking of some possibilities:
- Christians being conflicted about gay marriage.
- Jews being conflicted about Israel-Palestine.
- Muslims being conflicted about the hijab/niqab.
All of these things might be seen as getting in the way of the “love” taught by their respective prophets.
I saw this happen in the zero-waste movement a lot. One time, I saw someone post on Reddit how excited they were that they remembered to bring their reusable mug to the airport. One less thing in the landfill!
This was someone who was new to zero-waste. The top comment on that post? Chastising them for flying in an airplane and using disposable utensils with their meal.
This commenter was appealing to the “Us”, trying to appear holier than thou of the zero-wasters. The “Them” in this case could be seen as fighting consumerism and global warming. The “Us” becomes toxic. The “Us” can make you lose sight of what you actually believe in.
My main takeaway, here, don’t be so quick to judge. Don’t be an ass. It helps no one.
Next Reading
Essential Judaism: A Complete Guide to Beliefs, Customs and Rituals
A few years ago, I made it a point to focus my reading list around books on Canada. I certainly knew more than the average American about the “True North”, which can no doubt be credited to me living there. But I didn’t really know Canada. I didn’t know a lot about the history, what it means to be Canadian (a feat I hope to achieve in the next few years). I was creating my own “Canadian History and Culture” class.
I imagined myself reading at least a dozen different books; most are still on my “To Read” list on Goodreads. But I did read three fantastic books: “The Promise of Canada”, “The Morning After: The 1995 Quebec Referendum and the Day that Almost Was” and “The Inconvenient Indian”.
I’m proud to say I now know everything there is to know about Canada. (This is a joke)
The reason I wanted to make that reading list is that there was something so fundamental to my life, and yet I knew nothing of importance about it.
Backstory
This past May, I sent my mom this song:
I send songs to my Mom now and then. I usually either don’t get a response, or I get something along the lines of “oh, that’s nice.” But this time I received:
I nailed it.
I have an excellent relationship with my Mom. However, she’s very religious, and I’m very not; this has proven to be testy in the past. The last time I went back home, we were talking about one of the things where we adamantly disagree with each other. It was a beautiful night, just the two of us were sitting outside on the patio talking. However, In the end, both of us were sitting outside crying; this was all because of the hurtful things I had said.
Looking back, I’m full of dread from that conversation. I don’t regret the stance I took in that conversation (it hasn’t changed), but I do regret how I handled it. That conversation was pretty much the embodiment of how much contempt I held towards people who believed in any religion.
The dread from that conversation came in quickly, but my contempt, more or less, stayed the same for some months. It was something about being locked inside during this pandemic that forced me to reflect.
I called my Mom a few hours before I sent that text and told her about a meditation course I was doing with one of my friends whom she has met before. To my surprise, we had found some common ground here.
Though it wasn’t my intention at the start of the call, before I hung up, I apologized for the hurtful things I had said to her the summer before. My Mom is the strongest person I know, much stronger than I could ever be, she doesn’t hold grudges, and she appreciated what I said, but she honestly didn’t understand what I was apologizing for.
When she texted me back saying she loved the song, it felt indescribable. Honestly, I’ve been trying for a few minutes to explain what it meant and I just can’t put it into words.
On that call, I also told my Mom about the newest reading challenge I had set out for myself. This time it was about religion. I was approaching this challenge mostly for the sake of expanding my knowledge about the world.
If my Canadian reading list was about being able to understand my new home, then the religion reading is about understanding the people in my very diverse city.
After the phone call with my Mom, the intent of this challenge shifted to a place of love and empathy. I’m not doing this to find a religion I want to convert to and I certainly don’t want to be trying to tear people down by poking holes in what they believe in. I want people to be able to feel like they can be who they are around me, no different from what I want.
The Reading List
For the start of this, I’ve chosen four religions and five books.
Why Did Jesus, Moses, the Buddha, and Mohammed Cross the Road?: Christian Identity in a Multi-Faith World
by Brian D. McLaren
Finished August 8th, Read the Post
This is my first book and I’m not counting it as my Christian reading. I was raised Catholic and I figure something talking about living in a multi-faith world from a Christian perspective would be a good way to get my feet wet.
Also, conveniently, the title makes a nod to the four religions I’ve chosen to focus on.
Essential Judaism
by George Robinson
This book scares me the most because of how big it is. Based on some of the reviews, I likely won’t be able to read it all the way through because of how much ground it covers. But it’ll be a great book to keep around for reference.
The Book of God
by Walter Wangerin Jr.
This book also scares me. It’s a long book. A novelization of the bible (also a long book) and written a while ago. So it’s a novel (not usually a fan), uses old-ish language and is super long. At least I got the audiobook version!
No God But God
by Reza Aslan
Several years ago, I stopped by the National Mosque of Malaysia in Kuala Lumpur. That was my first significant exposure to Islam. They paired me up with a guy who was my age and from the states. He was either studying or doing some sort of training at the mosque, I can’t remember, but he knew a lot. He was very patient, showed me around also answered a lot of my questions. I still don’t know anything beyond the fundamentals, but this book came recommended.
What The Buddha Taught
by Walpola Rahula
My one exposure to Buddhism was a Meetup event in Dallas of all places. I can’t remember how much I learned from that, but I was surprised to find out how many Buddhists (at least in Dallas) were into bungee jumping.
This book, once again, was one that came highly recommended. I’m trying to be open-minded when reading all of these books, but this is the one I’m going to be the most open to when starting. I meditate on a semi-regular basis, and I’m generally into woo-woo stuff.
After This List
I have a few other books I want to read within this challenge, but I might not get to them. There’s also a lot more religions to learn about, so I’m just scratching the surface here. Baby steps.
As a final word, I sent my Mom another song yesterday that she liked:
I’m about to embark on a road trip to knock a few more state capitols off of my list.
I’ve done a lot of solo road trips; normally, I have my iPhone playing music, podcasts and my turn-by-turn directions. A pretty standard setup for a road trip these days.
For the first time, I’m going to try to do without the turn-by-turn directions. I’ll have my iPad with the maps downloaded for all of the destinations I’m going to. Of the many destinations I’m going to, I’ve only driven to two of them: Kansas City and Little Rock. For the latter, I’ll be taking a non-direct route for getting there. After KC it’ll be all new territory.
As a rule, if I get off my route, I’ll pull over, look at my iPad and just figure out – maybe even ask a human for directions.
I’ll update this post as my trip goes on.
Fun little fact, do you know the difference between capital and capitol? Capital is the place, capitol is the building.
Your senator works in the US Capitol in Washington DC, the capital of the US.
For the past five years or so I’ve been trying to hit every single US state capitol building. As a rule, I only count it if I actually step foot on the grounds of the capitol. Preferably, I go inside the building and take a tour. Some places have weird hours that make this hard. So just going to the city doesn’t count.
Even though I call Canada home now, I still love exploring the US. There’s a lot of history – some good, some bad and some is just plain fascinating. Seeing and touring different capitol buildings is a great excuse to visit every state and learn a bit about them.
As of this writing, here are the ones I’ve hit so far, in not particular order.
Washington DC
Went here a long time ago, still trying to find the photo.
Lincoln, NE
Went here a long time ago, still trying to find the photo.
Pierre, SD
August 2014
Out front
In the rotunda
Bismarck, ND
From the observation deck.
Salt Lake City, UT
Sacramento, CA
For whatever reason, this is the only picture I saved from this visit.
Carson City, NV
Phoenix, AZ
Richmond, VA
Atlanta, GA
Baton Rouge, LA
The Louisiana capitol was modelled after the capitol of my home state of Nebraska. It’s the tallest capitol building in the US and just one of a handful of skyscraper capitols.
From the observation deck.
Jackson, MS
Pretty common in the south to have a monument to the former
Confederacy. I’m standing next to a replica of the liberty bell which
was given to each state during WW2 as part of a war bonds campaign. A
lot of states will keep there’s either on the capitol grounds or inside
the building.
Cheyenne, WY
Montgomery, AL
Santa Fe, NM
Oklahoma City, OK
So far, OKC is the only capitol I’ve visited with another person – my buddy Matt.
Little Rock, AR
Tallahassee, FL
Nashville, TN
Frankfort, KY
Springfield, IL
Jefferson City, MO
This year I’ve set a resolution to be more deliberate in my actions especially online. And this is what that looks like for me:
Consider the information I’m sharing and who I’m sharing it with.
As a software developer, I let my guard down a lot more than most of my peers:
- I use a password manager, but I still get lazy and use the same password for different things.
- I rarely use VPNs or 2 factor authentication.
- I put basically all of my information into the hands of one massive corporation (Google).
- I literally created a website to share some of my intimate details – updated regularly.
Other than that last point, I don’t sound that different from the average person. Anecdotally, almost all of my friends who are outside of the tech world behave in this same manor.
Consider my average day and what time I’m devoting to what.
In 2019, I think most people can relate to being too attached to a screen. I think I use my phone less than the average person, but I still use it a lot. I often look back and consider how much I could have achieved if I wasn’t scrolling through Reddit or the news. Long ago I kicked my Facebook addition, but I constantly supplemented it for other things.
A lot of this second point is to simply drop my phone (which I did, more on that in another post) but it’s also more general. I started using an app called Headspace to do meditations. It’s been really nice, especially during stressful times, but I’m terrible at using it on a regular basis. Anyways, the big take away from meditation is regularly being mindful.
Tying it all together, being deliberate means being mindful of my actions online and off.
- Considering if the form I’m typing into will benefit me or cost me in the long run.
- Considering if the thing I’m doing right now is keeping me from something that will fill me with joy and accomplishment.
More articles to follow.